Unrealistic Expectations are Resentments Waiting to Happen
What do you expect from others? Are your expectations in a relationship realistic? Do you see yourself as demanding and unreasonable but do not understand why? Unrealistic expectations are resentments waiting to happen.
Being on the receiving end of someone with unrealistic expectations is no picnic. Actually, it can make the other person feel inadequate, miserable and unhappy. It could be a child, spouse or partner that gets your wrath. Does this sound familiar? “I can never please him,” or “I can never do anything right.” People with unrealistic expectations can be very demanding, critical, depressed, and seem impossible to please. Some people expect others to know what they want, to read their minds, to put their needs above all else – without even realizing it. It can be a parent who is critical of a child (even an adult child), who does not do exactly what the parent expects without regard to the child’s needs or feelings. It often causes very damaging results for the child if the pattern does not change.
Are your expectations are resentments waiting to happen?
How much self awareness do you have? Can you imagine how it would feel if someone were to treat you the way you treat them? Can you step back and see what it would be like to be on the receiving end of your anger and resentment? If you have any insight to see it is not working for you then therapy may help. It might be time to try something else, especially if you are unhappy, disappointed and angry. It is especially important if you don’t want your relationship to end or if you want a better healthier relationship with your child.
So if you are someone who needs help with persepctive on your expectations, psychotherapy may help you gain insight and awareness and gradually change unhealthy attitudes and behaviors.
If you have a parent who loves you deeply, but has made it difficult for you to be separate and autonomous – and you spend most of your interactions trying to please and not upset her, then therapy may help you as well. It causes low self esteem to take care of a parent’s emotions and feelings at your own expense.
Unrealistic expectations are resentments waiting to happen, and the hostility and anger they cause can erode relationships over time. If you are open to it, psychotherapy ( most people think of it as counseling) can help you make some positive changes which will be better for your relationships and your life.