Stay or Separate?

In a bad marriage or unhappy relationship?

Can we work it out or not?

Many couples in an bad marriage or relationship are at a critical point and search for professional help to figure things out. Divorcing or breaking-up is not an easy option, but things are so unbearable and you can no longer handle how distant and disconnected you are. Something has to change. Some couples consider marriage counseling, couples therapy or even discernment counseling to help make some decisions. Are you losing hope and want to know if you can back from the brink and improve your marriage or relationship?

There are number of reasons couples end up in a bad marriage.

Does this sound familiar?

• You feel alone and so unhappy in your marriage
• You do not feel secure and cannot trust your partner or spouse
• You feel very disconnected and misunderstood
• Your spouse or partner had an affair and you are not sure if you can stay togehter
• You want to work thing out after infidelity, but want the whole truth
• You cannot seem to listen and communicate effectively
• You or your spouse are dealing with substance abuse or alcoholism
• You or your spouse cannot resolve issues without being verbally or emotional abusive
• You fight about household responsibilities, children, step-children, finances, sex
• You repeatedly feel like you don’t matter and are not a priority
• You never have intimacy or sex
• You just can’t feel secure and trust your spouse

Are you at a point you have to decide what to do about a bad marriage or relationship? Need the help of a licensed and experienced therapist to help you make those important decisions? Would it be best to try marriage counseling, couples therapy or discernment counseling?

A Bad Marriage and Discernment Counseling

Briefly, discernment counseling is very short term therapy for couples that are at a very critical point in their marriage. Many couples need help making some decisions about working on things or calling it quits.

Are you looking for help to see if you can turn things around or if you are better off separating, divorcing or breaking up? A part of the discernment counseling may lead a couple back to marriage counseling for a commitment of a period of time – maybe 3-6 months or so. Marriage or couples counseling with the right therapist (if you have never done it or it has not been helpful in the past) may help you take a closer look at negative patterns and cycles to see if they can be changed. This will take assesssing your specific situation to see if (with help) you can get out of your “cycle” and learn to connect in more satisfying and positive ways.

Can you both ultimately get to a better place, feel more connected and happier in your marriage or relationship? Or not. There is no way of knowing without taking a serious look at what you’ve been doing and going through – and your attitudes about one another at this point.

If you are ready to discuss what to do about a bad marriage or relationship, feel free to get in touch by phone or email and let us know how we can help.