Unhappy in Your Marriage ?

Unhappy in Your Marriage?

Not Sure What Steps to Take?

Feeling Unhappy in Marriage or a Relationship?

We often hear from many individuals who are are struggling and feeling unhappy in their marriage or relationship. Some after a new baby, some during pregnancy and others because of long standing and ongoing communication problems. Some people don’t understand why they are unhappy and say “just for no reason”.

In some situations, one spouse or partner is willing to go to therapy, and the other is not. They refuse to go or it seems they just don’t even care about the relationship enough to make the effort.

So what can you do if you’re unhappy and your partner won’t go the couples therapy? We do hear from many women and men, gay and straight, who can benefit from reaching out to a therapist even if you have to go alone to work on things at home. It’s a good way to take care of yourself and explore what you can and cannot do to get to a better place.

Exploring issues causing you to feel unhappy:

cheating, infidelity, affairs
feeling neglected
feeling your spouse or partner just does care about the relationship
feeling like you don’t matter
feeling unimportant and unappreciated
feeling your spouse or partner is not there for you
dealing with step-family or blended family problems
parenting differences causing problems
struggling with issues related to pregnancy
having trouble adjusting to a new baby

If you’re feeling unhappy in your marriage or relationship, it may help to see how therapy can help you – with or without your partner.

Need help?

Relationship Problems

Depression, Relationships

Feeling Stuck?

Relationship Problems?

Get in Touch

Getting Help with Relationship Problems

When Jodie gave birth to their daughter, it was such a happy time for them. Even though the pregnancy was not easy, they were thrilled when Erica was born. However, the stress of a new baby and the changes made things between them pretty bad.

Relationship Problems Cause Stress

As it does for most couples, the routine of work and family life can put a huge strain on a relationship. Couples can start feeling more unhappy, distance from each other and become disconnected. It takes a lot of energy to deal with the needs of your children, household responsibilities, work, and your relationship. Not getting enough quality time for yourself or the relationship can take its toll.

Since it is challenging to successfully deal with all of these issues and keep your relationship in tact, consider professional help. Why? Because it is sometimes hard to do it on your own. Not only will you and your spouse or partner benefit, your children will too.

You see they are watching you. You are teaching them what relationships are about. They are learning how to treat or be treated by a future boyfriend, girlfriend or spouse. So what do you want them to learn? There are so many loving, well-meaning parents that don’t realize how their behavior impacts their children in so many ways. For the better and the worse. Like it or not, your relationship with your spouse is your child’s model for his or her relationships.

If you’re struggling and stuck in the same patterns, try finding a therapist to help you deal with relationship problems in much more effective ways.

Finding Relationship Help

Relationships

Relationships in Need of Help

Getting to a Better Place

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Need Relationship Help?

Some of us look forward to weekends with our loved ones — no work and time for closeness, romance, and relaxation. Right? The reality for many is that weekends are much than difficult than work days. because rather than feel excited about being together and connected to one another, you feel lonely and disappointed. Spending time with someone who makes you feel miserable instead of loved, can be very painful. Are you in need of relationship help and wonder what to do?

After a bad stretch, some people may pick up the phone and reach out for professional help and others might look for self help books or online support or resources.

Here are some helpful videos by John Gottman that describehow to make relationships work.

Getting Relationship Help

Making Relationships Work Part 1

Making Relationships Work Part 2

Making Relationships Work Part 3

Making Relationships Work Part 3

Criticism (criticism is dangerous to a relationship)
Contempt (mocking and acting superior is toxic for a relationship and actually erodes the immune system)
Defensiveness (toxic because people are not taking responsibility for part of the problem)
Stonewalling (toxic because it seems you’re disengaged and couldn’t care less about what your partner is saying or doing)

If you’ve been unsuccessful trying to improve things on your own, it may be time to call an experienced marriage or relationship therapist. It’s an important (and sometimes difficult) step to understanding and working toward changing some destructive patterns in your relationship.

We hope you find this information useful as you search for relationship help and try and build a stronger and more satisfying relationship.

Feeling Isolated and Alone?

Depression, Gay Issues, Grief, Relationships

Feel Isolated and Alone?

Not Sure What to DO?

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Feeling Isolated and Alone?

Are you feeling isolated and alone? Is isolating causing you to feel depressed and ashamed or is it the other way around? Social or emotional isolation can have very painful consequences. It can even affect your health.

Alone Time – Is it Helping or Hurting?

Spending time alone can be a very healthy way to deal with a busy, stressful life. It’s a way of emotionally and mentally recharging. It’s great to have some quiet time to relax, deal with stress and do things you enjoy. After all, everyone could use a break from day to day responsibilities, whether it’s work, family or household responsibilities. There are many benefits to finding time for yourself.

However, if spending time alone is more about avoiding others and fearing interacting with others ( friends, family, at work), it can hurt you. Isolating might feel like the safer option, but it can make you feel worse.

Why do people isolate?

you feel sad ( and/or ashamed) and learned it’s safer to withdraw rather than risk reaching out to others for help
you feel ashamed or struggling with low self esteem or self worth
you feel depressed and have never felt like anyone can help or cares
you’re grieving over the loss of a family member or going through a painful divorce or break up
you’re in a painful marriage or relationship and feel very alone and can’t let people know how awful you’re feeling
you don’t feel like you have people who can you can trust to be there for you
social interactions feel more painful than isolating
you struggle making friends or dealing with others in social situations
you’ve moved to a new area ( common in Maplewood and South Orange ) and it’s hard to make new friends and get connected
you have a new baby and the change feels isolating
you’re an introvert and/or a highly sensitive person ( HSP ) that is finding it more difficult, overwhelming and draining to put yourself out there

If you’re feeling isolated and alone and have pulled away from people in your life, find out what may help connect. You have to feel safe enough to reach out and stop isolating.

Therapy and support groups can help deal with the issues that make you isolate. You can find ways to deal with your fears and anxiety to get more connected and socially engaged. For some people, it might mean learning how to reconnect with family and friends you can trust, and with others, it might mean finding a support group or other support network to help you.

Feeling Isolated and Alone

Reach out for help when you’re ready. Get in touch here contact us.

We hope you find this helpful.

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