Maplewood Counseling
Infidelity Therapist to Help You Tell Your Partner

Infidelity Therapist to Help You Tell Your Partner

INFIDELITY THERAPIST NEAR ME
HOW TO TELL YOUR PARTNER
MAPLEWOOD, NEW JERSEY 

 

Need a Infidelity Therapist
to help you tell your partner?
We Can Help

 

Contact Us | Trusted Infidelity Therapy

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Need an Infidelity Therapist?

Want to tell your partner about an affair, but don’t know how?

Contact Maplewoood Counseling

How an Infidelity Therapist Can Help

Coming Clean and Being Honest

Want to know what to do about infidelity and how to tell you partner or spouse before they find out? Infidelity is extremely difficult to admit to, but continuing to be dishonest, lie and deny things can be even more harmful not only to the relationship, but the person having the affair. So many men and women who start affairs can’t even believe the Made such. mistake. “It is never something I thought I would do”, “I can’t believe I’m here”, “I’ve always been faithful and thought affairs happened to other couples”. And now you find yourself in an affair and the guilt is destroying you.  You may need an infidelity therapist to help.

Understanding Infidelity

Is this You?

  • you were vulnerable to infidelity because of lack of connection, passion and feeling like you don’t matter
  • the kids, work, everything but the realtionship was a priority
  • we became so distance in your marriage over the years and felt unhappy and alone
  • there is/was some kind of thrill and adrenaline rush – maybe feeling alive again
  • it just felt good to be wanted for the first time in a long time
  • the infidelity may be masking an underlying issue such as depression, grief or trauma from the past

When things aren’t going well at home other things can happen. The insidious effects of the lack of connection can often start the process with what feels like is harmless flirting, texting and talking. Slowly you start wanting to do it more and more. Secretly you find ways to connect with the other person. Sometimes your spouse or partner senses something and starts questioning you, but you deny things when your spouse questions you, which really feels lousy.

When couples feel disconnected, forming a connection with someone else can (unfortunately) happen. Some couples realize they have lost the connection and choose therapy to help them and work on reconnecting before it goes down that path. Others may not really be aware of what they’re doing. Not feeling good about the marriage or relationship and then someone else pays attention to them – it can happen easily in these situations.

Once lines are crossed…

The toll an affair takes on the person having the affair can be huge. Good marriages and people do end up here. It usually happens over time – a couple becomes disconnected. Circumstances of busy lives, raising children, pressures at work, and trying to manage it all. Finding it difficult to maintain your connection and giving the relationship the attention it needs is very challenging. Depression, disappointment, anger, loneliness, not feeling like a priority, no sex or intimacy, frequent fights can all take a toll on your relationship.

How do I Tell My Wife, Husband or Partner About Current or Past Infidelity?

It’s not an easy thing to do. You may need an infidelity therapist to help.

Are you still having the affair? Are you trying to end it? Is the affair in the past, but guilt about the betrayal is eating away at you?

Fear of losing your marriage and family is the biggest reason people don’t want to admit to infidelity. So much pain it will cause and so much to lose if things can’t be worked out. Also, ending something that has given you much needed attention can be very difficult. It can cause men and women to feel grief, especially if you formed an attachment to the other person. You find yourself in a really hard place to be. Letting go of the affair may be painful (or not) and telling your spouse will be painful.

You may be ready to take the steps to end an affair and/or tell your spouse about the infidelity. You may need help doing this in the most sensitive and safe way possible. An infidleity therapist can help you do this in a safe place. You can take the steps to repair the damage, understand, talk and reconnect.

Need help healing your relationship? Contact Maplewood Counseling in Essex County New Jersey and let an experienced infidleity therapist help you take the steps to heal infidelity.

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Conflict in Relationship?

Conflict in Your Relationship

New Jersey Couples Counseling

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Conflict in Your Relationship?

Conflict in your relationship or marriage? We all have to deal with conflict in our relationships. When two people come together from different needs and backgrounds, there is bound to be conflict. We all have different abilities to really take in and understand the other person. It can be very difficult to  communicate effectively when things get hard. Couples sometimes have unrealistic expectations and an  inability to understand what the other person need. This causes great disappointment. We can all get hooked by unconscious triggers based on our conditioning. The end result? Conflict that leads to great disappointment, hurt and anger.

Ruptures are bound to happen in all relationships. It’s not the ruptures that become the problem as much as how well a couple can “repair” the rupture and understand one another.

What is Your Pattern When You Have Conflict?

  • We get very angry at one another and hurl insults and criticism
  • One of us goes on the attack and the other withdraws and puts up a wall, which only makes things worse
  • We both used to fight and it got us nowhere so now we just both just give up and stop talking, sometimes for days or weeks

Author, psychiatrist and therapist Daniel Siegel explores relationships and attachment in detail in his books. Here refers to the 4 Ss and what is needed for healthy attachment and relationships. How very important it is for us all to feel:

  • SEEN
  • SAFE
  • SOOTHED
  • SECURE

How our early attachment figures responded to us emotionally (or didn’t respond in many cases) will most likely be the way we end up relating in our romantic relationships. It has a lot to do with the ability (or inability) to understand one another and repair problems in our relationships. If a person did not any or all of the combination of seen, safe, soothed or secure, they might most likely will struggle with similar issues in their adult relationships. Reliving the past over and over is extremely painful. It can cause rage, anger, deep sadness and feelings of rejection, and ultimately like you don’t matter.

Getting Help with Conflict in Relationship

With help, a couple can learn how to take in the external experience of the other person and help them feel seen, safe, soothed and secure. Learning to emotionally respond to your spouse or partner can help you connect in deeper and more meaningful ways.

If you’re looking for a relationship or marriage therapist in New Jersey, contact us now at 973-902-8700 or email us if that’s easier for you.

 

Marriage Counseling NJ Reviews

Marriage Counseling NJ Reviews

Marriage Counseling NJ Reviews  

Maplewood Counseling Reviews

 

Marriage Counseling NJ Reviews at Maplewood Counseling

 

When looking for reviews about Maplewood Counseling, it’s important to keep in mind the unique nature of therapy and the privacy concerns that often accompany it. Therapy is an incredibly personal experience, and many clients choose to keep their journeys private. As a result, reviews may not fully represent the number of individuals who have benefited from therapy at Maplewood Counseling. The deeply confidential nature of counseling often makes people hesitant to share their experiences publicly, even when they’ve had a positive and meaningful outcome.

That being said, we’ve included a few genuine reviews below to give you a glimpse into the care and support provided at Maplewood Counseling. These reviews come from clients and colleagues who felt comfortable sharing their thoughts to help others make informed decisions. They reflect the compassionate, professional, and supportive environment our therapists work hard to create for every individual who walks through our doors.

If you’re exploring therapy and have questions about our services, we encourage you to reach out to us directly. We understand that choosing a therapist is a personal and significant decision, and we’re here to provide the information you need to feel confident in your choice. Whether you’re seeking support for yourself, your relationship, or your family, Maplewood Counseling is dedicated to helping you navigate life’s challenges with care, respect, and understanding.

Testimonials

 We went to couples therapy and had a very good experience with Robert. We have been able to find better ways to communicate and resolve issues. Things are so much better now. I highly recommend!

⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐

S.D.

I just want to say that my wife saw Bob Jenkins several times and we were very happy with his ability to help us. He created a safe space for us to express ourselves and offered good advice as well. We would recommend him to anyone! Thank you so much for connecting us with Bob. Please tell Bob that we are doing very well and we have turned the corner (for the better) regarding our issues. Thank you!!

⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐ ⭐

A.S.

If you are looking for marriage counseling or couples therapy, we are very skilled and experience. Get in touch and let us know how we can help.

 

Marriage Counselor in NJ | Healing Your Relationship Journey

Marriage Counselor in NJ | Healing Your Relationship Journey

Rediscovering Your “Us”: A Journey Through Marriage Counseling in NJ

 

Rediscovering Your "Us": A Journey Through Marriage Counseling in NJ

Do you remember when the silence between you felt comfortable rather than heavy? Or when a glance across the room conveyed love instead of frustration? Relationships are living, breathing entities that change over time, and sometimes, the distance between two people can feel like an ocean, even when you’re sitting on the same couch.

If you are reading this, you might be feeling lost, hurt, or simply exhausted from trying to fix things on your own. That is okay. Acknowledging that your marriage needs support isn’t a sign of failure—it is a brave first step toward healing. At our New Jersey practice, we don’t just “fix” problems; we help you navigate the emotional journey back to one another.

Is Your Relationship Telling You It Needs Help?

Marriages don’t usually break down overnight. Instead, small cracks appear—unspoken words, missed connections, or resentments that pile up quietly in the corner. You might be wondering if your struggles are “bad enough” for therapy.

Consider if any of these feelings resonate with your current reality:

  • The Roommate Syndrome: You function well as a team managing the house and kids, but the romantic spark and emotional intimacy have faded into the background.
  • The Cycle of Conflict: Do you find yourselves having the same argument over and over, with different subjects but the same painful outcome?
  • The Weight of Silence: When hurt occurs, do you shut down or build walls to protect yourself, leaving your partner feeling locked out?
  • The Shadow of Infidelity: Has trust been shattered by an affair, leaving you unsure if the pieces can ever be put back together?
  • The Feeling of Invisibility: Do you feel like your needs, dreams, or feelings no longer matter to the person who is supposed to care the most?

These experiences are painful, but they are also common. They are signals that the emotional bond—the glue that holds you together—needs attention and care.

Moving Beyond “Fixing” to True Connection

Many couples come to therapy hoping for a referee to decide who is right, or a mechanic to tinker with the broken parts of their dynamic. But true healing goes deeper than that.

Our approach to marriage counseling in NJ is rooted in the belief that connection is the antidote to conflict. When you feel safe, understood, and valued by your partner, the practical disagreements about money, parenting, or chores become much easier to navigate.

What Does the Journey Look Like?

Therapy is a process of unravelling the knots of misunderstanding. Here is how we walk that path with you:

  1. Creating Safety: First and foremost, we create a non-judgmental space where both partners feel heard. There are no “bad guys” here—only two people trying to find their way.
  2. Uncovering the Cycle: We help you identify the negative patterns you get stuck in. It’s not that you want to hurt each other; it’s often that your attempts to connect (or protect yourself) are misfiring.
  3. Speaking from the Heart: We guide you to move beyond surface-level complaints (“You never do the dishes”) to the deeper emotional truths underneath (“I feel overwhelmed and alone when I don’t have help”).
  4. Rebuilding Trust: Whether trust was eroded by a major betrayal or years of small letdowns, we provide the framework to rebuild it, brick by brick.

You Don’t Have to Walk This Path Alone

The emotional toll of a struggling marriage affects everything—your sleep, your work, your parenting, and your sense of self. Trying to carry that weight alone is exhausting.

A skilled marriage counselor acts as a compassionate guide, holding the lantern when the path gets dark. We help translate your pain into language your partner can understand and help you hear the pleas for connection hidden in their defensiveness.

A Special Note on Infidelity

If your marriage has been rocked by an affair, the pain can feel insurmountable. You might be oscillating between rage, grief, and a desperate hope for reconciliation. Please know that many couples not only survive infidelity but build a stronger, more honest relationship on the other side. It takes work, time, and courage, but renewal is possible.

Transform Your Challenges into Growth

Imagine what it would feel like to come home to a partner who feels like a sanctuary rather than a source of stress. Imagine having the tools to turn a conflict into an opportunity for closeness.

Marriage counseling isn’t just about saving a relationship; it’s about transforming it. It’s about learning to love and be loved in a way that makes you both feel secure, valued, and alive.

Whether you are in the midst of a crisis or simply want to deepen a connection that has grown stale, we are here to support you. You deserve a relationship that lifts you up.

Ready to Reconnect?

The distance between you doesn’t have to be permanent. If you are ready to begin the journey toward healing and connection, we invite you to reach out.

Let’s help you find your way back to “us.”

Frequently Asked Questions About Marriage Counseling in NJ

What happens during our first marriage counseling session?
Your first session is about creating safety, understanding, and trust. Both you and your partner will have the opportunity to share your perspectives, hopes, and concerns. Your counselor will guide the conversation gently, helping to identify patterns and challenges while honoring each person’s voice. The focus is not on assigning blame but on beginning a journey toward deeper understanding.

How long does marriage counseling usually take?
Every relationship is different, so the length of therapy varies. Some couples find new insights and relief within a handful of sessions, while others benefit from ongoing support as they work through long-standing patterns. We’ll check in with you regularly to adjust the plan to your needs, always keeping your goals in focus.

Do both partners need to attend every session?
While joint sessions are most common and create space for open communication, we recognize that life circumstances or comfort levels may make this difficult at times. If needed, individual sessions can be woven in to address personal concerns or help prepare for joint sessions. We meet you where you are—your journey is unique, and we’ll collaborate to find what works best for both of you.

What if one of us is hesitant or resistant to begin therapy?
It’s natural for one or both partners to feel uncertain about counseling. We understand that taking this step can be daunting. If you or your partner are reluctant, we create a low-pressure, respectful space to explore those feelings together. Sometimes simply talking openly about your worries in a neutral setting can help ease anxiety about the process. Remember, willingness to grow and even small steps forward matter.

Will our sessions be confidential and judgment-free?
Absolutely. Your privacy and emotional safety are our top priorities. What you choose to share in therapy remains confidential, and we are committed to maintaining a respectful, non-judgmental environment for both partners, regardless of your history or background.

Can marriage counseling really help if we’re thinking about separation or divorce?
Yes. Many couples come to counseling at times of great uncertainty. Therapy provides a safe, structured space to gain clarity, communicate openly, and make thoughtful decisions—whether your goal is to rebuild your relationship or part ways amicably. There is hope even in difficult situations.

How do we know if a marriage counselor is the right fit for us?
A trusting client-therapist relationship is essential. In our first meeting, you can expect warmth, openness, and space to ask questions. We encourage you to share your preferences, fears, and hopes. You deserve to feel comfortable and respected. If at any point you feel something isn’t working, we can discuss options or help you find a provider who better meets your needs.

Do you support couples from all backgrounds and identities?
Yes. Our practice is devoted to creating an inclusive environment where all couples—regardless of race, ethnicity, orientation, gender, spiritual beliefs, or family structure—are welcome and affirmed. We honor each relationship’s unique strengths and challenges and strive to adapt our support with sensitivity and respect.


If you have any other questions or concerns about marriage counseling, we warmly invite you to reach out. Every step toward understanding is a step toward healing.

Helpful Resources 

Need Divorce Counseling in NJ?

Need Divorce Counseling?
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Looking for Divorce Counseling?

A divorce for most men and women is devastating and extremely painful. Even if things have been bad for a long time, giving up and throwing in the towel is very difficult. You’re bound to feel sadness and grief about ending a relationship or marriage.

Some cope with the loss with sadness and grief, while others feel intense anger, bitterness and resentment.  Either way it causes tremendous suffering, but trying to find a better way to cope with the feelings can make a huge difference on your mental and physical health.

No doubt feeling of anger, resentment and bitterness will prolong the suffering and make things worse. Usually what’s under the anger is grief and sadness, but it’s hard to get to. Hanging onto the anger and allowing your thoughts to fuel that fire is very harmful to yourself, your children and your ex.  Most people don’t care about the harm they do to the ex. Actually, they want bad things to happen to their ex. Some want him or her to die or wish awful things such as illness or accident.

Does this sound familiar?

  • I can’t seem to cope with the anger in more constructive ways, but I want to
  • I feel so resentful – like he or she did this to me and want to know how to handle those emotions
  • I am stuck and feeling bitter and can tell I am making things worse for myself
  • I don’t want to continue to bash my ex and involve my kids, but it’s a go to place
  • I do want peace

We all want peace. It is sad and hard on you and your spirit to wish these things, although it is understandable you don’t know how to handle the intense amount of suffering and loss you feel. I’ve seen many couple go through a bitter, nasty divorce only to find peace over the years. Wouldn’t it be great if you could find a way to get there faster? To deal with you feelings in ways that help you let go of self defeating and destructive thoughts and actions? That’s where divorce counseling can help.

Divorce Counseling to Help You Find Peace

The type of therapy we provide is one-to-one help. Helping men and women find a way through the pain to accept and find peace. We can help you explore feelings of depression, anxiety, grief, anger  and how your thoughts can make things worse.  We can help you process your grief,  make sense of things and move in a more positive direction.

Need a therapist to help?  Contact us if you live or work in Northern NJ in Essex County.

Relationship Therapy | Creating a Safe Place

Relationship Therapy NJ

All Relationships

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Relationship Therapy | A Safe Place for Couples

If you’re at a point in your marriage or relationship where you just cannot resolve things on your own, relationship therapy may help.  Therapists will often try and create a safe place for couples to work on resolving their issues. According to Daniel Siegel, MD and therapist, the 4 S’s are needed to create more secure and healthier relationships…to feel SEEN, SAFE, SOOTHED and SECURE.  Areas where one or more of these are not met will cause a couple to really struggle.

Is this you?

  • you can’t seem to discuss anything without fighting
  • you feel your spouse or partner just won’t listen to you
  • you escalate into name calling in an attempt to feel heard and understood
  • you put up a wall to protect yourself from what feels like a constant attack
  • you feel incredibly sad and alone
  • you feel desperate to feel heard and understood and can’t seem to make your spouse be there for you
  • you’re feeling hopeless about repairing the damage

Relationships are about rupture and repair. We all experience some type of rupture at times. No relationship is immune from dealing with problems. What is important is knowing how to repair the ruptures. To get better and making your spouse feel seen, safe, soothed and secure.

Relationship Therapy Can Help Repair Ruptures

Find ways to help your spouse or partner

  • feel seen by becoming better at listening and understanding the internal experience of the other rather than getting defensive. Feeling felt is very important to connection.
  • create safety by listening and taking in the other person’s experience and reflecting on what each of you may be feeling
  • soothe one another by joining rather than feeling alone and withdrawing from one another
  • feel secure and be open and flexible to areas and issues that may be causing insecurity (and also exploring earlier attachment issues that may be getting triggered)

Secure, happy relationships can create such joy as well as improve to your overall health and wellness. You and your spouse or partner can learn how to repair your relationship ruptures better to create a closer connection.  If you need relationship therapy in Essex County, NJ, please contact us.