Maplewood Counseling

Relationship or Marriage Problems?

Marriage Problems?

Not Sure What to Do?

Contact Maplewoood Counseling

Ongoing Marriage Problems Causing Stress?

Are you and your spouse or partner struggling in your relationship? Have you tried unsuccessfully to fix things on your own? Are there certain recurring problems that never seem to get resolved?

Is this you?

  • You or your spouse had an affair and you cannot seem to repair the damage the cheating cause to your relationship
  • You and your spouse or partner have an ongoing pattern of not responding to one another emotionally
  • Anger and disappointment is getting in the way of you and your your spouse or partner feel like you matter to one another
  • You feeling alone most of the time and it feels like like your spouse is not there for you in very important ways
  • You feel like you can’t count on your partner or spouse to be there when you really need him or her

 

If you’ve been struggling for a long time in your marriage or relationship, things can go to a very painful and lonely place for both people. Walls go up and fights get more escalated. Or both or one of you ends up withdrawing because you don’t know what else to do. You are feeling stuck.

When it comes to the most successful and loving relationships, partners respond to one another emotionally. Some people know how to respond emotionally, but don’t want to because of angry or hurt feelings. Others need help understanding how to and why it is important to respond to your spouse or partner.

Get Help with Marriage Problems

Need marital or family therapy in Essex County, NJ? Call Maplewood Counseling at 973-793-1000 or email for help with marriage problems now and let us know how we can help you.

Marriage Counseling for Older Couples

Marriage Counseling for Older Couples

Marriage Counseling for Older Couples

Marriage Couples for Older Couples and Seniors

Long Term Marriages, Mid-life Relationships and Second Marriages

Are you an older couple looking for help with a relationship issues?

Does this sound familiar?

  • You’ve been marriage over 20 years and your not in a great place
  • You’re in a second marriage (or third) and things are complicated
  • You’re in a new relationship after divorce or death of a spouse and need help adjusting
  • You’re single and starting over and want help with you relationship style and choices
  • You’re dealing with your partner or spouse’s young or adult children
  • You’re trying to get over infidelity or other betrayal

We work with older couples who need help with relationship issues whether they come in together or alone. Whether it is communication problems, infidelity, trust or other issues from the past that have been hard to recover from, we can help. It will help to sort through your marital issues with an experienced marriage therapist.

 

Need help with a long-term marital problems?

Are you a couple that has been married over 20 years? Are you empty nesters facing new challenges in your marriage since your kids are in college or on their own? (**We also help people in a new relationship after divorce, in a second marriage and single starting over).

Many couples have been so busy focusing on the needs of their teens during high school and getting ready for college, there has been less time for the marriage.   For couples like this it isn’t until children kids are gone that many realize how much is really missing in their relationship. Now it’s just the two of you – and for some couples that’s not a good thing. Many couples at this point struggle with a lack of connection and wonder what to do.

Years of Issues – Can We Reconnect?

Like many couples, maybe you’re in a marriage that has been neglected due to work and family responsibilities.  The relationship was clearly not a priority. And in other cases, it seemed better to avoid each other because you just couldn’t seem to get what you need or get along anymore. You’ve accepted the distance and lack of connection because you just didn’t know what else to do.

Can anything be done to turn things around? After all, this is the time you can finally focus on one another. Can you get back to something more meaningful in your marriage? Can you slowly rebuild what has been lost? Or do you have to make other decisions?

Marriage or discernment counseling can help you figure things out.  Are you are both committed to the process and hopeful about the outcome? Do you both want to see if you can work on regaining your connection? Or do you wonder if you can come back from what feels like the point of no return.

Counseling can help you discuss long-standlng issues and feelings to see what can be done. It can also help you explore next steps in your marriage.  Are you both open to understanding, talking, listening, and repairing? Are you both committed to working through hurt, anger, and past disappointments? Or will be hard to do this…these are the questions we will explore in sessions.

Marriage Counseling for Older Couples

Marriage Counseling for Older Couples and Seniors

Nurturing Relationships in Mid-Life and Beyond

Marriage is often described as a journey, one entered with hopeful hearts and a vision for a shared lifetime. Yet as time transforms youth into middle age and beyond, the journey’s terrain shifts as well, quite often bringing unexpected challenges and transformative moments. For many older couples, these moments can lead to a reevaluation of their relationship, raising important questions about what they want for the rest of their lives. Marriage counseling, a resource often associated with the younger demographic, plays a crucial role in guiding these couples in maintaining and strengthening their bond. In this comprehensive guide, we explore the heart of marriage counseling for older couples, understanding the unique landscape of mid-life relationships and the benefits of seeking therapeutic support.

Importance of Marital Satisfaction in Older Age

With increasing life expectancies, the concept of being ‘old and married’ has shifted to encompass more years and, consequently, more life to be lived together. A fulfilling and satisfying marriage in older age is not just a luxury; it’s a significant contributor to overall health and happiness. Research consistently demonstrates that strong marital relationships can lower the risk of chronic health conditions and act as a buffer against the stresses of aging. Thus, investing in the marital bond post-retirement and beyond can be seen as an investment in one’s quality of life.

 

Marriage Counseling for Older Couples

Marriage Counseling for Older Couples, Couples in Midlife, Empty Nesters, Baby Boomers | In-Person & Telehealth Virtual Sessions

Compassionate Marriage Counseling for Older Couples, Seniors, Caretakers

We provide marriage counseling for older couples from ages 50 plus in need of help with family and relationship challenges.  We offer sessions 7 days a week virtually and in person.

Challenges Faced by Older Couples

The golden years often bring with them a new set of challenges that can test the endurance of any relationship. Older couples frequently grapple with transitions such as retirement, the ’empty nest’ phenomenon, health concerns, and the natural process of aging, which collectively can strain communication and intimacy.

Transitioning into Retirement

The structure of daily life changes drastically upon retirement, with spouses suddenly spending the majority of their time together. This shift in dynamic can be both exhilarating and overwhelming, leading to the discovery of new shared interests or exposing previously unnoticed differences.

Empty Nest Syndrome

After decades of child-rearing, the silence left by adult children moving on can leave couples feeling disconnected and unsure of how to redefine their relationship without the primary focus on family.

Health Concerns and Aging

The reality of aging often brings with it health issues that can significantly impact individual well-being as well as the couple’s ability to enjoy activities together.

Communication and Intimacy Issues

As bodies and minds change, so do the ways in which couples communicate and express intimacy. In the hurried years of raising a family and building careers, these foundations may have been inadvertently neglected, requiring a renewed focus in the years of retirement.

Benefits of Marriage Counseling

Marriage counseling offers a structured, supportive environment for older couples to unpack these challenges and work toward a more fulfilling relationship. The benefits are manifold, from improved communication to the development of new coping mechanisms for life’s inevitable changes.

Enhancing Communication Skills

Counseling equips couples with tools to communicate effectively, ensuring that they can express their needs and emotions constructively.

Addressing Unresolved Issues

Years can pass with unresolved conflicts that subtly erode the marriage. Counseling provides a platform to address these issues directly.

Reinforcing Emotional Connection

As daily life evolves, so must the emotional connection between partners. A counselor can guide couples in reconnecting and deepening their emotional bond.

Developing Coping Strategies

Therapy can help couples anticipate and plan for the challenges of aging, ensuring they have effective strategies to navigate this new phase of life.

Specific Considerations for Older Couples

Marriage counseling tailored to the specific needs of older couples navigates the nuances of second marriages, blended families, financial management, adult children, and the preservation of intimacy.

Second Marriages and Blended Families

For couples entering into a second marriage or managing a blended family, counseling can help establish new family dynamics and co-parenting strategies.

Dealing with Grief and Loss

Older couples may face the loss of close family and friends or the challenges of personal health; counseling provides a space to grieve and heal together.

Managing Financial Changes

The financial impact of retirement and aging can be substantial; counseling can help couples navigate these changes with open and honest communication.

Nurturing Intimacy and Sexual Satisfaction

Counseling for intimacy is an essential focus for many older couples, helping them rediscover and effectively communicate their desires and needs, ensuring mutual satisfaction.

Choosing the Right Counselor

The success of marriage counseling for older couples often hinges on the expertise and experience of the therapist. Maplewood Counseling specializes in couples’ therapy and has experienced and licensed therapists who work frequently with older adults.

Experience and Expertise with Older Couples

We have experience working with older couples and understand the unique challenges faced by aging individuals will ensure the sessions are fruitful and relevant.

Compatibility and Trust

Establishing a rapport with the counselor is vital. Ensure that both spouses feel comfortable with the therapist and are able to trust their guidance and expertise.

Conclusion

Marriage counseling for older couples presents a powerful opportunity to rejuvenate and strengthen relationships. As the fabric of life changes with age, investing in one’s marriage can ensure that the journey continues to be fulfilling and meaningful. I encourage older couples to explore the possibilities that counseling offers, to bridge the communication gaps, address unresolved issues, and foster a deep sense of connection that endures the tests of time. Nurturing your relationship post-midlife is not just about longevity; it’s about the richness and quality of the years you have left together.

Whether you are in a long-term marriage, second marriage or new relationship or second marriage – we can provide a safe place to explore these important questions, please get in touch.

Save Marriage | Can We Prevent a Divorce?

Saving My Marriage Possible?

Is it too late?

Contact Maplewoood Counseling

Save Marriage | Can Therapy Help Save Our Marriage?

Does this sound familiar?

  • We are not sure things can change to save our marriage
  • I/we cannot go on the way things are going without help
  • I don’t trust my spouse and we fight about it constantly
  • I just found out my spouse cheated on me and I’m devastated
  • We are dealing with an affair that happened awhile ago, but I can’t get over it
  • We’ve tried everything and this is a last resort
  • I feel so incredibly alone and my partner is just not there for me
  • We are so unhappy and have been for a long time
  • I don’t feel like I matter and it is so painful
  • I know or suspect my spouse or partner is having an emotional or sexual affair
  • I feel so angry and disappointed in my spouse most or all the time
  • I love my spouse or partner, but we fight so much and I don’t know why
  • I’m not sure if it’s worth saving our marriage and I feel hopeless
  • My spouse says he or she will change and it never sticks
  • I’m never a priority and it feels awful

I am not in love with my wife or husband anymore and not sure what to do

Can We Turn this Around? Is it possible to save our marriage?

Are you looking for ways to see if you and your partner or spouse can turn things around and save your marriage or relationship? Is this your last attempt before you call it quits?

Some couples have tried marriage counseling in the past and maybe it helped, button enough – or maybe it didn’t help at all. Many wonder if marriage counseling or family therapy is worth it. With some therapists and for some couples, it is worth it if it can hep you reconnect and find ways to improve the way you feel about one another.

If both people are really committed to the process, it may help you turn things around. We’ve seen many couples learn how to (and more importantly want to) improve how they respond emotionally to one another. Emotional responsiveness (according to a leading innovator in the field of couples therapy Dr. Sue Johnson) is one of the most important (if not the most important) aspects of creating meaningful and long lasting connections in a relationship.

If you are looking for a NJ therapist to help you with your marriage or relationship, please contact us and let us know how we can help you or call us if that’s easier for you.

Local Marriage Counseling NJ

Local Marriage Counseling

New Jersey Therapy

Contact Maplewoood Counseling

Local Marriage Counseling in NJ?

We get many calls from couples in areas in and around Maplewood. We provide therapy to many couples who live or work in the Livingston, Chatham, Summit, Springfield, West Orange and many other local areas.  Sometimes couples prefer going to another local town for counseling for privacy, so we often see couples and individuals who live in other local communities.

Some of the issues we help couples with:

  • Coping with an affair and trying to rebuild trust
  • Feeling unhappy and distant
  • Fighting about money, chores, sex, or parenting issues
  • Dealing with step-family or blended family problems
  • Cannot seem to communicate without arguing
  • Not sure how to approach your spouse about some important issues
  • Feeling unappreciated, resentful and angry

If you need help with your relationship, contact us at Maplewood Counseling and let us know how we can help you.

we are her to help couples, families and individuals who live or work in New Jersey including anywhere by Telehealth video session or in person for people that are will to travel to our Essex County NJ office.

Three Tips on the Right Way to Fight

Three Tips on the Right Way to Fight

3 Tips to Fight the Right Way

Skills to Strengthen Your Relationship

3 Tips to Fight the Right Way

And Strengthen Your Relationship

3 Tips to Fight the Right Way ( and Strengthen Your Relationship)

3 Tips to Fight the Right Way and Strengthen Your Relationship

Disagreements are a natural part of any relationship. But how you and your partner approach those moments can either build a stronger connection or create lasting wounds. Healthy conflict resolution isn’t about avoiding disagreements entirely but about tackling them with empathy, mutual respect, and a goal of finding solutions that benefit both of you.

When conflicts are addressed constructively, couples often find that these challenges can bring them closer. Moving through disagreements with understanding fosters trust, strengthens communication, and leaves both partners feeling valued and heard. Instead of dreading conflicts, it’s time to look at them as opportunities for growth and deeper connection.

Curious how you can transform your disagreements into meaningful conversations? Here are three powerful strategies to help you handle conflicts in ways that nurture your relationship.


1. Listen Actively and Practice Empathy

Active listening is the foundation of productive, respectful conflict resolution. It’s more than just waiting for your turn to speak—it’s about truly understanding your partner’s perspective and emotions.

When you listen actively, you’re showing your partner that you value their feelings and what they have to say. Instead of focusing on building your rebuttal in your head, pause and listen to absorb their words. Empathy then bridges the gap, allowing you to recognize their emotions and validate their experiences without necessarily agreeing with them.

Here are some active listening tips you can use during your next disagreement:

  • Reflect back. Use phrases like “It sounds like you’re feeling…” or “What I’m hearing is…” to confirm your understanding of what they’re expressing.
  • Ask clarifying questions. Questions like “Can you explain why this is so important to you?” help dig deeper and prevent assumptions.
  • Minimize distractions. Put your phone down, turn off the TV, and maintain eye contact to show you’re present and focused.
  • Validate their emotions. Even if you see things differently, acknowledging feelings with statements like “I can understand how that might be frustrating” creates a safe space.

Empathy doesn’t require complete agreement, but it does demonstrate that you care about your partner’s experience. By listening fully and responding thoughtfully, you build a team dynamic even in challenging moments.


2. Focus on the Problem, Not Each Other

Conflicts can quickly escalate when issues become personal attacks. There’s a major difference between addressing a specific concern and criticizing your partner’s character. To strengthen your relationship, focus on tackling the problem—not tearing each other down.

For example, compare these two statements:

  • Criticism: “You’re always so messy.”
  • Constructive communication: “When the kitchen is left messy, I feel overwhelmed. Could we create a system to keep it tidy?”

The first approach accuses and generalizes, which can cause defensiveness. The second shifts the focus to the issue at hand and expresses a clear, actionable need.

Try these strategies to keep disagreements productive:

  • Use “I” statements. Say how the situation affects you rather than placing blame. For example, “I feel unappreciated when plans change without notice” is better than “You’re so inconsiderate.”
  • Avoid absolutes. Words like “always” and “never” make sweeping judgments and are rarely accurate. Instead, keep your language specific.
  • Stay present. Avoid dragging past issues into current disagreements. Focus on one topic to keep discussions manageable.
  • Express needs, not traits. Replace “You’re selfish” with “I felt hurt when my feelings weren’t considered.”

Timing matters too! Choose a moment when you’re both calm, relaxed, and able to dedicate the time needed for a constructive conversation.


3. Collaborate for Win-Win Solutions

Conflict shouldn’t be a competition where one person wins and the other loses. Healthy relationships thrive when both partners feel heard and satisfied with the outcome. This is where collaboration comes in.

Win-win solutions focus on meeting the needs of both individuals. When you prioritize working together rather than against each other, you’ll often uncover creative solutions that strengthen the partnership rather than dividing it.

Here’s how to foster collaboration during disagreements:

  • Identify underlying needs. Go deeper than surface-level issues. For instance, an argument about spending time together might really be about a need to feel valued or connected.
  • Brainstorm together. Without judging ideas too quickly, list possible solutions that can work for both of you.
  • Compromise with flexibility. Collaboration often requires adjustments from both sides. Be open to finding middle ground.
  • Create agreements. Instead of issuing ultimatums, discuss and agree on steps you can both commit to.

Regularly check in on how solutions are working and adjust together if needed. Over time, collaboration builds trust and makes conflicts a team effort rather than a solitary struggle.


Using Conflict to Build a Stronger Bond

Learning to handle conflicts with care and intention doesn’t just solve problems; it builds a foundation of trust and respect that strengthens your relationship. Couples who master these skills enjoy deeper emotional connection, improved communication, and a sense of partnership that can weather any challenge.

Change doesn’t happen overnight, and old patterns may resurface from time to time. What matters most is your shared commitment to continuous growth and mutual support.

Need help getting started? Seeking guidance from a couples therapist can provide personalized strategies and tools to refine your conflict resolution approach. They offer a safe space to explore challenges and build skills tailored to your unique relationship dynamics.

Your partnership is worth investing in. By approaching disagreements with empathy, collaboration, and a focus on solutions, you’ll strengthen your bond and create a relationship where both of you feel valued, understood, and supported.

 

Find us on Marriage.com

Unhappy in Your Marriage ?

Unhappy in Your Marriage?

Not Sure What Steps to Take?
Get in Touch

Feeling Unhappy in Marriage or a Relationship?

We often hear from many individuals who are are struggling and feeling unhappy in their marriage or relationship. Some after a new baby, some during pregnancy and others because of long standing and ongoing communication problems. Some people don’t understand why they are unhappy and say “just for no reason”.

In some situations, one spouse or partner is willing to go to therapy, and the other is not. They refuse to go or it seems they just don’t even care about the relationship enough to make the effort.

So what can you do if you’re unhappy and your partner won’t go the couples therapy? We do hear from many women and men, gay and straight, who can benefit from reaching out to a therapist even if you have to go alone to work on things at home. It’s a good way to take care of yourself and explore what you can and cannot do to get to a better place.

Exploring issues causing you to feel unhappy:

  • cheating, infidelity, affairs
  • feeling neglected
  • feeling your spouse or partner just does care about the relationship
  • feeling like you don’t matter
  • feeling unimportant and unappreciated
  • feeling your spouse or partner is not there for you
  • dealing with step-family or blended family problems
  • parenting differences causing problems
  • struggling with issues related to pregnancy
  • having trouble adjusting to a new baby

If you’re feeling unhappy in your marriage or relationship, it may help to see how therapy can help you – with or without your partner.

Need help?

Get in Touch with Maplewood Counseling in NJ