Female Therapist for Individuals & Couples Therapy in NJ

Anxiety, Depression, Gay Issues, Grief, Relationships, Therapist

Female Therapist in NJ

Therapists at Maplewood Counseling

Get Started

Find a Female Therapist in NJ

Maplewood Counseling has Female Counselors to Help Couples & Individuals

Experienced Female Therapist in NJ

Therapists for Couples, Individuals, & Families

Locating female therapist isn’t just about receiving clinical care; it’s about finding someone who can validate your unique lived experiences and understand the intersectionality of their challenges.

Maplewood Counseling Female Therapists in NJ

Some common issues that female therapists can help with include marriage counseling, couples therapy, anxiety, depression, trauma, self-esteem, family, LGBTQ, and step-family and blended-family challenges. as well as parenting issues.

Help with Marital & Relationship Issues

Marriage can be a wonderful and fulfilling partnership, but it also comes with its fair share of challenges. We can provide support and guidance for couples struggling with communication issues, infidelity, or other conflicts within their relationship. They can help couples learn effective communication techniques, build trust, and work through any underlying issues that may be causing tension in the marriage.

In addition to providing couples therapy, female therapists can also offer premarital counseling for couples looking to strengthen their relationship before tying the knot. This type of therapy can help partners learn effective communication and conflict resolution skills, establish shared values and goals, and address any potential concerns or challenges that may arise in the future.

Help with Parenting Issues

Being a parent is a tough job, and it can be even more challenging for women who may face unique challenges and experiences in the process. Female therapists can provide support and guidance for mothers struggling with postpartum depression, navigating blended families, or dealing with issues related to race and identity within their family dynamics. They can also offer tips and techniques for managing stress, setting boundaries, and building positive relationships with their children.

In addition to individual therapy, female therapists may also offer family therapy for parents and their children. This can be especially helpful for families going through major transitions or facing challenges such as divorce, loss, or relocation. Through open communication and a safe space to express thoughts and feelings, families can work towards creating healthier relationships and stronger bonds.

Help with Step-Family Issues

Blended families, or families with step-parents and step-children, can face unique challenges in their dynamics. Female therapists can provide support and guidance for blended families to navigate the complexities and potential conflicts that may arise. They can help family members communicate effectively, set boundaries, and work through any underlying issues related to identity, loyalty, and expectations.

In addition to addressing challenges within the family, therapists can also work with step-parents to help them navigate their role and develop a positive relationship with their step-children. They can provide tools and techniques for building trust, managing conflicts, and establishing mutual respect.

Help with Cultural Identity

Navigating cultural identity can be a challenging process for people of any race or ethnicity, but it may hold unique complexities for Black individuals. Black female therapists can provide a safe and understanding space for clients to explore their cultural identity and its impact on their beliefs, values, and relationships.

They can also offer guidance for those who may be struggling with conflicting identities or feeling pressure from societal expectations. Through therapy, individuals can gain a better understanding of themselves and develop strategies for managing any internal conflicts.

Support for Trauma and Racism

Racism, discrimination, and microaggressions can have a profound impact on Black individuals’ mental health.Our female therapists are well-equipped to provide support and healing for those who have experienced trauma or racism in their lives.

Therapists can help clients process their experiences, build resilience, and develop coping mechanisms to navigate ongoing racism and discrimination. They can also assist with managing any associated symptoms such as anxiety, depression, or PTSD.

Furthermore, Black female therapists may also offer a unique perspective and understanding of the systemic issues at play in society that contribute to racism and discrimination. This can provide clients with a sense of validation and empowerment to advocate for themselves and their communities.

Help with Anxiety

Anxiety is a common mental health issue that can greatly impact an individual’s daily life. Black female therapists can provide support and guidance in managing anxiety symptoms, developing coping mechanisms, and addressing underlying causes.

In addition to therapy sessions, a therapist may also suggest incorporating self-care practices such as mindfulness, exercise, and journaling to help manage anxiety.

Help with Depression

Depression is another commonly treated mental health issue that can greatly affect an individual’s overall well-being. Our female therapists in NJ can provide a safe and non-judgmental space for individuals to express their thoughts and emotions, as well as work towards finding healthy ways to cope with depression.

Therapy sessions may involve identifying triggers and learning coping strategies such as cognitive behavioral therapy or other evidence-based approaches.

Help with Relationship Issues

Relationships can be a source of both joy and stress in our lives. Black female therapists can help individuals navigate through various relationship challenges, whether it’s with family, friends, or romantic partners.

Therapists may assist in identifying communication patterns, setting healthy boundaries, and developing effective conflict resolution skills to improve relationships and overall well-being.

Help with Communication Skills

Effective communication is essential in all aspects of life, and therapy can be a valuable resource in improving these skills. A black female therapist can provide guidance and support in developing assertiveness, active listening, and conflict resolution skills.

These skills not only improve relationships but also enhance self-esteem and overall confidence in communication.

Help with LGBTQ+ Concerns

Our female therapists in NJ can also provide a safe and inclusive space for members of the LGBTQ+ community. Therapy sessions may focus on issues specific to this community, such as navigating coming out, managing discrimination, and developing a positive self-image.

In addition to individual therapy, couples or family therapy can also be beneficial in addressing communication and relationship challenges within the LGBTQ+ community. Black female therapists can offer a supportive and understanding environment for all individuals, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity.

Support for Women’s Issues

Women face unique challenges in today’s society, and therapy can be a valuable tool in processing and managing these issues. Black female therapists can provide support and guidance for women struggling with body image, self-esteem, career goals, motherhood, and more.

Therapy can also be beneficial for women experiencing trauma, such as sexual assault or domestic violence. Black female therapists are trained to create a safe and empowering space for women to heal and find strength in their experiences.

Cultural Understanding

In addition to providing support for specific issues, our female therapists in NJ can also offer a deeper understanding of cultural influences on mental health. As individuals, we are not only shaped by our personal experiences but also by the societal and cultural norms surrounding us.

Therapists from similar backgrounds can provide a unique perspective and understanding of these influences, creating a more comprehensive approach to therapy. Black female therapists can help clients navigate the intersectionality of their identities and how it may impact their mental well-being.

Relationship Challenges

Relationship problems can take many forms, from difficulties communicating and resolving conflicts to infidelity or trust issues. Black female therapists can offer a neutral and non-biased perspective on these challenges and provide tools for better communication, conflict resolution, and building healthy boundaries in relationships. They can also help individuals work through past traumas or personal issues that may be affecting their current relationships.

Couples therapy is another option for those seeking support in improving their relationship. Black female therapists are trained in helping couples identify and address underlying issues, improve communication and intimacy, and learn healthy ways of resolving conflicts. Seeking couples therapy with a Black therapist can provide a culturally sensitive and understanding approach to navigating challenges in a relationship.

Help with infidelity

Infidelity can be a devastating experience that can cause immense pain, trust issues, and self-doubt. Black female therapists can help individuals process their emotions and work towards healing from the betrayal. They can also assist in addressing underlying issues in the relationship and rebuilding trust through effective communication and boundary setting. With a Black therapist, individuals can also explore cultural and societal factors that may have played a role in the infidelity and work through any associated guilt or shame.

Parenting support

Raising children can be challenging, especially for BIPOC parents who may face additional stressors such as racism and discrimination. Black female therapists can provide support and guidance to parents in navigating these challenges while also addressing any personal issues that may be impacting their parenting. They can also help parents develop effective communication and discipline strategies, work through conflicts with co-parenting, and prioritize self-care to better support their children.

Parenting and family therapy

Raising children and navigating family dynamics can be challenging, especially for Black families who may face unique cultural and societal pressures. Black female therapists can provide support and guidance for parents and families, helping them navigate difficult conversations, set boundaries, and improve communication. They can also address issues such as intergenerational trauma and the effects of systemic racism on family dynamics.

Help with Sexuality Issues

Furthermore, Black female therapists can also offer a safe space for individuals who are struggling with issues surrounding gender and sexuality. They can provide support and understanding for those who may be facing discrimination or navigating coming out to their families and communities. These therapists can also address issues related to self-acceptance, self-confidence, and healthy relationships within the LGBTQ+ community.

Self Esteem

Self-esteem is the overall opinion one has about themselves and their self-worth. Low self-esteem can manifest in negative self-talk, lack of confidence, and feelings of inadequacy. Black female therapists can assist individuals in rebuilding their self-esteem through techniques such as cognitive-behavioral therapy, positive affirmations, and self-care practices.

Grief

The loss of a loved one or a significant life event can trigger intense feelings of sadness and grief. Black female therapists can provide support and guidance in navigating through the grieving process and finding ways to cope with the pain. They can also help individuals honor their loved ones, find meaning in their loss, and move forward towards healing.

If you are looking for a female therapist in NJ, get in touch. We can help.

Get in Touch

Online Therapy NJ

Find us on Psychologytoday.com

LGBTQ Counseling for Couples, Individuals, and Families

Gay Issues, Relationships

We Empower LGBTQ+ couples with effective counseling in Maplewood, NJ and virtually from any location in New Jersey. LGBTQ+ Affirming Therapy.

In person and Online Sessions

LGBT Friendly therapists in Nj

Feel Heard and Truly Understood

Proven Support for Lasting Change

Book Nearest and trusted LGBTQ therapist in New Jersey Area

Book Now

Free 15 Minute Consultation

Highly Recommended for LGBTQ Therapy

J.T & C.T.

“We searched for LGBTQ therapist because my partner and I had been struggling with communication and trust issues. Our sessions gave us a safe, open space to discuss things and find better ways to connect. Not only have we improved how we communicate, but we now understand how to resolve our issues. We are so grateful for the support and guidance we received—it’s been so helpful! ”

We help you and your partner get what you Need

Struggling to Communicate Effectively?

Open and honest communication is essential, but misunderstandings can create distance and frustration. Our counselors provide a supportive space to help LGBTQ+ couples express themselves clearly, listen with empathy, and rebuild meaningful connections.

Facing Trust Issues in Your Relationship?

Broken trust can feel overwhelming, whether caused by past experiences or current challenges. Our therapy sessions guide LGBTQ+ couples in identifying the root of trust issues, fostering transparency, and rebuilding a secure, loving relationship.

Dealing With Constant Conflict?

Frequent arguments or unresolved tensions can weigh heavily on your relationship. We help LGBTQ+ couples understand each other’s perspectives, develop healthy ways to manage conflict, and create a stronger, more harmonious partnership.

Book Now

Free 15 Minute Consultation

Supporting every need of LGBTQ+ Couples



Book lgbtq therapists within 24 hours



Get In-person and Virtual sessions



Personalized therapists for your unique needs

LGBTQ Therapy for Couples at Maplewood Counseling

Start Today for a Brighter, Healthier Relationship

80% of families report improved communication after participating in counseling sessions.

Families feel better equipped to resolve conflicts, with 75-85% experiencing a more harmonious home environment.

Trust and connection grow within families, with 70-80% reporting stronger relationships and deeper understanding.

Schedule Appointment

Our Mission and Values

At Maplewood Counseling, our mission is to provide trusted, quality therapy services both in Essex County and virtually across New Jersey and beyond. With over 50 years of combined experience, we specialize in helping couples rebuild their emotional and physical connections, fostering deeper intimacy, trust, and understanding.

Our approach integrates effective, research-based therapy that creates lasting, positive change for individuals, couples, and families. Leading with humanity and compassion, we ensure that every client feels supported and valued throughout their journey toward a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.

Trusted, Quality Therapy

Black Marriage Counseling

In-person and Online Marriage therapy

Neutral, Balanced Support

Schedule Appointment

★★★★★

Quality Services

“I just want to say that my wife saw Bob Jenkins several times and we were very happy with his ability to help us. He created a safe space for us to express ourselves and offered good advice as well. We would recommend him to anyone! Thank you so much for connecting us with Bob. Please tell Bob that we are doing very well and we have turned the corner (for the better) regarding our issues. Thank you!!“

More Reviews



Get a Quote or schedule a Free consult



Book a Licensed therapist to help you



Schedule In-person or virtual sessions

Book a Free 15 Minute consultation to give us a chance to hear your story and help you

Free 15 Minute Consultation

Testimonials

Frequently Asked Questions

What is an LGBTQ therapist?

An LGBTQ therapist specializes in supporting individuals from the LGBTQ community, offering a safe, affirming space to explore identity, emotions, and challenges while addressing societal discrimination.

How can an LGBTQ therapist help with relationships?

LGBTQ therapists offer a nonjudgmental space to address relationship issues like stigma, communication barriers, and trust while tailoring support to your unique needs and experiences.

How can we find an LGBTQ couples therapist?

Search online directories, ask for referrals from LGBTQ organizations or friends, and schedule consultations to find a therapist experienced in LGBTQ relationships.

What is LGBTQ therapy?

LGBTQ therapy focuses on challenges specific to the community, such as coming out or identity exploration, while providing a supportive space to address mental health and personal growth.

What is the best therapy approach for LGBTQ individuals?

Effective approaches include CBT, EFT, and family therapy, which improve communication, self-acceptance, and understanding within relationships and families.

What is a queer-affirmative therapist?

A queer-affirmative therapist supports and celebrates LGBTQ identities, addressing stigma and providing a safe, inclusive environment for personal growth and exploration.

Does CBT work for LGBTQ individuals?

Yes, CBT helps LGBTQ individuals manage mental health concerns, challenge stigma, and foster self-acceptance, provided the therapist is culturally competent.

What is queer intimacy?

Queer intimacy includes emotional, physical, and sexual connections in LGBTQ relationships, challenging societal norms while fostering self-expression and empowerment.

Schedule Appointment

Helpful Resources

LGBTQ Relationship Therapy: Affirming therapy for LGBTQ+ individuals and couples.
Therapy for LGBTQIA+ Individuals: Support for navigating identity and relationships.
Blended Family Therapy: Guidance for LGBTQ+ blended families.
Managing Relationship Anxiety: Tools to navigate anxiety in LGBTQ+ relationships.
Inclusive Couples Counseling: Support for couples navigating cultural or identity differences.

Telehealth Online Counseling Services

Anxiety, Depression, Gay Issues, Grief, Relationships

Telehealth Online Counseling Services

Therapy Sessions Online

Get in Touch

Maplewood Telehealth Online Counseling Services

Would it be more convenient to do therapy online?

Many clients used telehealth online counseling services instead of in-person counseling at a physical location during the COVID-19 pandemic. In fact, for some people, this service was very effective and provided extra benefits by allowing greater convenience along with more flexibility.

How does teletherapy work?

Just as you make an appointment for an in-office session, you’ll make an appointment to meet online. Through devices such as computers, iPads/tablets, and smartphones, you can have interactive sessions with your therapist. Many online conference tools are available. Software apps such as Zoom, FaceTime, Skype, and Google Meet are a few. You still see each other face-to-face. However, your meeting is virtual.

Can you get as much out of telehealth online counseling as in-person therapy?

As a matter of fact, you can. Your therapist uses the same therapy tools that are used during in-person sessions. According to several of our existing clients who have been in marriage counseling, couples therapy, individual therapy, or family counseling, it is very effective at addressing issues and concerns.

Does the therapy online provide advantages?

There are a number of advantages. For one, you don’t have to drive to the therapist’s office for sessions. You don’t have to deal with scheduling issues, traffic, cost of gas, getting sitters, and much more. In fact, if one partner is at work and the other is at home, the Telehealth session link can bring us all together to work on issues.

Virtual remote therapy is private and secure. Yet, you continue to have a close one-on-one connection with your therapist. Or, if involved in group therapy, your group sessions can also take place online. You’ll still be able to see and hear the other participants in the group.

You may find that therapists can often provide greater accessibility through teletherapy. After all, you both can save time by not having to travel to their office, deal with parking, or arrive late due to traffic.

In addition, there’s an added advantage for clients who feel self-conscious about physically traveling and walking into a therapist’s office. In that respect, you may experience a greater sense of privacy.

Are there extra costs for online therapy?

Typically, no. Costs vary from one therapist to the next. But, most charge the same hourly rates whether in-person or online.

Is there anything you should do to prepare for an online session?

To avoid interruptions, ensure:

You have a private, quiet spot for your session
Your device is fully charged
The location has a strong internet connection

Maplewood Counseling Online

If you visit Psychology Today, you’ll see many therapists are now offering telehealth online services. In fact, you’ll find me listed in their teletherapy directory.

Want to give it a try?

Give us a call or text at 973-793-1000 to discuss setting up an online session. While some people might miss the feel of an in-person encounter, other people prefer the advantages of online counseling. Try it out and see. Discover for yourself if it’s right for you.

Have questions for us? Get in touch

Online Therapy NJ | Maplewood Counseling

Anxiety, Depression, Gay Issues, Grief, Relationships

Online Therapy NJ

Virtual Counseling for Couples, Individuals & Families

Get in Touch

Effective Online Therapy NJ

Are you looking for online therapy to help you with a relationship, personal, or family challenge? Online therapy is just as effecitve as in person and offers convenience and accessibility. We have several options to help you.

Online Couples Therapy

African American Black Maplewood Counseling NJ

Online Therapy for Individuals

Online Marriage & Family Therapy

Ready to Start? Let's Connect

The Many Benefits of Online Therapy NJ

All of our therapists offer online sessions. Here is Marina Fried talking about how we help with online therapy.

Online therapy or virtual counseling can help if you’re struggling with mental health issues or simply need someone to talk to. The process of online therapy involves communicating with a licensed therapist through digital platforms like video calls, phone calls, or messaging.

There are numerous benefits to seeking therapy through online means, including:

Convenience:

One of the biggest advantages of online therapy is the convenience of doing sessions from home or work. as well as other places. You no longer need to take the time to drive to an office, which saves time and money as well. and money.

Accessibility:

Online therapy is much more accessible for coiples, individuals, and families who may be abke tiaccess face-to-face or in-person sessions due to living at a distance, mobility issues, as well as busy schedules. You can also find specialized therapists who may not be available in your local area.

Flexibility:

Online therapy offers flexibility in terms of scheduling. With traditional therapy, you may have to work around your therapist’s availability and may even have to take time off work for appointments. However, with online therapy, you can schedule sessions at a time that works best for you.

Comfort:

For some people, the thought of sitting in a therapist’s office can be daunting or uncomfortable. Online therapy allows you to receive therapy in a space where you feel most comfortable, which can make the experience less intimidating and more effective.

Issues online therapy in NJ can help with:

Some common issues that can be addressed through online therapy in NJ include depression, anxiety, stress, relationship problems, parenting, relationships, trauma, and grief. Additionally, online therapy can also assist with managing chronic health conditions or navigating major life transitions.

Does online therapy help with couples therapy or relationship coaching?

Yes, online therapy can be effective for couples therapy or relationship coaching. Through video conferencing, couples can have sessions together with a therapist and work on improving communication, resolving conflicts, and building a stronger relationship. Online therapy also offers the added benefit of being able to schedule sessions at a time that works for both partners, even if they are in different locations.

In addition, it is important to note that online therapy may not be the best option for individuals with severe mental health concerns or those in crisis situations. In these cases, it may be necessary to seek immediate in-person treatment. It is always best to consult with a licensed therapist to determine the most appropriate form of therapy for your specific needs.

Online therapy nj can help couples who need marriage counseling, couples therapy and help for relationship and family issues. We also help individuals looking for counseling to help with depression, anxiety, grief and loss, divorce or a break up, LGBT gay relationship and personal issues and more.

Online Therapy NJ | Virtual Sessions

Is this you?

You need online counseling since you cannot make sessions in person.
You are going through a rough time and need a therapist that can offer remote session so you can get help from home or work.
You’re struggling with relationship or family issues and need help asap.
You’re struggling with parenting issues or other family conflict.

We offer online therapy NJ session for couples and individuals who are in need of professional counseling and are not able to attend sessions in person for any reasons and want the convenience of accessing help from home or work.

We are licensed and skilled therapists who can help with personal and relationship problems. Common issues we can help with include:

Communication problems
Long term disconnect and unhappniness
Lack of intimacy
Arguments about children, step children
Infidelity and affairs
Resolving conflict more effectively
Family problems, in-law challenges, paenting issues
Anxiety, depresison, grief, self esteem, being a better patner or parent
Deciding whether you can work things out

If you are in need of online therapy, which we can offer flexibly by phone, video, FaceTime, Telehealth and other formats if you live in New Jersey and even if you are in NY since one of our therapists are licensed in New Jersey and New York. If you need help now, get in touch. We are here to help.

Need Online Therapy in NJ? Get in touch

LGBTQ+ Affirming & Gay Relationship Counseling in NJ

Gay Issues, Relationships

LGBTQ+ Affirming Gay Relationship Counseling

LGBT Gay Relationship Counseling NJ

We provide LGBTQ gay relationship counseling to help couples strengthen their communication, resolve conflicts, and build deeper emotional connections. Our goal is to create a safe and affirming space where partners can openly discuss their challenges and work together to achieve a healthier, more fulfilling relationship.

We help with communication issues, infidelity, family conflict, and more. We are very experienced with LGBTQIA+ issues and provide a supportive and non-judgmental environment for self-exploration and growth.

Let's Get Started

Gay Relationship Counseling

Professional LGBT Gay Relationship Counseling

Need Gay Relationship Counseling?

New Jersey is a pretty progressive state when it comes to gay LGBT individuals, couples and families. In some communities, such as Maplewood and South Orange SOMA where our practice is located, there are many gay and lesbian couples, married and couples, who have families and children. It is a very diverse and welcoming community to families of all types.

Relationship and family dynamics, however, are complicated and struggle with many of the same issues straight couples face. Communication problems, family conflict, infidelity and decisions to stay together or break up. LGBTQ Gay relationships can be harder for people that are not out and don’t feel comfortable sharing their lifestyle and some of their struggles with other family members or coworkers. It can feel isolating and make a stressful situations even worse. Finding professional help can also feel difficult if you worry your doctor or provider will not make you feel comfortable. As a result, it is important to find an experienced, open and accepting therapist who can help.

Get in Touch

Gay Relationship Counseling

LGBTQIA Couples Therapy

Same Sex Marriage Counseling

Breaking Binary

Gay Issues, Relationships

Binary, Pansexual, Gender Fluid

Couples & Individuals

Understanding Pansexual, Gender Roles, Gender Binarism, Gender Fluid

Breaking Binary

Thinking about gender in terms other than “male” and “female” does not come naturally to many of us. Our instinct, when we think of gender at all, is to default to the mainstream view of two—and only two–genders. Given our society and collective experience, this is not surprising. From the day we are born, it is printed on our birth certificate. It is reinforced by bathroom doors, and the M or F bubbles on our standardized tests in school. But it is much more than that. As you read this article, keep an open mind and forget what you have been conditioned to think as we break down the Gender Binary.

Before I begin to dissect Gender Binarism, I want to explain the image that has come to be known as “The Genderbread Person.” Remember when you were in first or second grade and learning how to read? Didn’t the pictures just make it that much easier? Well, following that logic, the Genderbread Person is here to make this discussion that much easier. As you can see, there are four different characteristics highlighted by Genderbread: gender identity, gender expression, biological sex, and sexual orientation.

To make this next statement clear, I have put each of these on its own continuum. Okay, are you ready?… Each of these characteristics is independent of the others. Just because you may fall all the way to the right on one scale, it does not mean that you are all the way to the right on all four. Keep this in mind as we dissect each of the four categories

(note: a common term now is pansexual – a pansexual person is not limited in sexual choice with regard to gender, biological sex, or gender identity.)

Gender Identity: A Personal Conception of Oneself

Gender Identity refers to who you think you are in your mind. This spectrum ranges from “woman” on the left to “man” on the right, and anyone who falls in between is classified as “genderqueer.” Genderqueer refers to those do not fall under conventional “male or “female” gender distinctions, but instead can relate to both (bigender), neither (agender), or any other combination (third-gender,etc.) that can fall in the middle of the spectrum.

Gender Identity comes 100% from your very own mind. If you want to figure out your gender identity, try asking yourself the following questions:

Do you think you fit better in society in a male role, a female role, both, or neither?
Do you find yourself falling in the middle of the continuum, or do you think you fall completely outside of the spectrum to the left or right?

Your answer to these questions indicate your gender identity.

Gender Expression: How You Show The World Who You Are

Gender Expression refers to the way we manifest gender. This spectrum ranges from “feminine” on the far left to “masculine” on the right, and anyone who falls in between is classified as “androgynous,” or a combination of partially male and female in appearance. Gender expression reflects how you show your gender through your appearance, actions, behavior, etc. and how others interpret your expression based on traditional gender roles. Now,this can be a tricky concept, because you can actually find yourself shifting on the scale daily. You may wake up in a baggy shirt and shorts (masculine), but then shower and put on make-up and a dress (feminine). The reality,contrary to traditional belief, is that many of us fall somewhere in the androgynous section of the spectrum.

Biological Sex: Your Anatomy

Biological Sex refers to what your body possesses, both internally and externally, including your organs, hormones, and even chromosomes. This spectrum ranges from “female” on the far left to “male” on the right, and anyone who falls between is considered “intersex,” defined as someone who has sexual organs, hormones, or chromosomes of both. When it comes to biology, there is a pretty clearly defined line of what is male and what is female.

Other than surgical alterations, some people can be born intersex. For example, a person can be born with male external sexual organs, but internally have a functioning female reproductive system. The Intersex Society of North America (http://www.isna.org/faq/frequency) reports that 1 in 100 people are born with bodies that differ from the standard male or female.

Sexual Orientation: Your Sexual Identity in Relation To Whom You Are Attracted

Sexual Orientation refers to who you are attracted to on emotional, physical, and spiritual levels. This spectrum ranges from “heterosexual” on the far left to “homosexual” on the far right, and anyone who falls between is classified as “bisexual,” or attracted to individuals who are either male or female. If you are a man ONLY attracted to women or a women ONLY attracted to men, you are heterosexual and fall on the far left. If you are a man who is attracted to men (gay), or a woman who is attracted to women (lesbian), you are homosexual and fall to the far right. If you are attracted to both men and women, no matter your own gender, you are considered bisexual and fall somewhere in the middle.

Instead of approaching this with the question “Do you like women or men?” try to think deeply about your fantasies, dreams, thoughts, emotional connections to others, and sexual contact. Now choose a number from the chart below:

“0 – Exclusively Heterosexual

1 – Predominantly heterosexual, incidentally homosexual

2 – Predominantly heterosexual, but more than incidentally homosexual

3 – Equally heterosexual and homosexual

4 – Predominantly homosexual, but more than incidentally heterosexual

5 – Predominantly homosexual, incidentally heterosexual

6 – Exclusively Homosexual”

Based on this method, Dr. Alfred Kinsey brought to light that most people who think they are “straight” (heterosexual) actually fall between 1-3, while most people who think they are lesbian/gay (homosexual) fall between 3-5… Where do you fall?

Stitching It Back Up

Now that we have dissected each individual category, I want to return to what I said in the beginning. Although there may be certain overlaps, these four sections are NOT intrinsically interconnected. Your Gender Identity does not determine your Biological Sex, your Sexual Orientation does not determine your Gender Expression, your Biological Sex does not determine Sexual Orientation… no matter what category you compare with another, they do not determine each other- but they certainly can relate.

I will leave you with this last example and statement. If a person is born with a female Biological Sex, and is raised as a female, and identifies as a female, and expresses herself as a female, this person is classified as “cisgender,” meaning that the person’s self-identity conforms with the gender that corresponds with their biological sex. But, on the other hand, there are so many people for whom this is not the case, and I hope that reading this helped you to understand yourself, or your friend, or your loved one, or your classmate, or your parent, or your child, or anyone who may zig-zag through these spectra, because no matter how you put it together, while we all may be different, none of us are wrong.

« Older Entries

Next Entries »